Meant to be Kept Read online

  Swallowing the emotion that bubbled at his words and forcing that incessant voice of caution in her mind to be quiet, she stepped down the last step separating them. The slight elevation advantage she had nearly put her at eye level with Tanner.

  Two weeks ago that comment would have made her wrap her arms around him, offer deep kisses, and make all kinds of promises of the things she would do to him later. She would never have hesitated, never have thought twice about it. But today her hand shook slightly as she reached out to stroke his cheek. Her smile wobbled just before she leaned in for a kiss.

  For several long moments, Tanner’s hands stayed at his side, and when the realization hit Izzy that he was letting her set the pace, she wanted to cry. He’s trying, her heart reminded her.

  She ran her tongue along his bottom lip and wound her arms around his neck. The deep moan from the back of his throat made her smile as she continued to tease him. Finally she felt his arms encircle her waist and her heart soared. In spite of everything that happened, being held by Tanner made her feel loved.

  She had no idea how long they would have stayed fixed in that spot, doing nothing more than enjoying each other, if not for the thundering arrival of their children behind them. Izzy couldn’t help but laugh at Tanner’s disappointed groan when they bounded out of the house, chattering away at the same time.

  He lifted a hand to her cheek once more and gave her a last lingering kiss, chuckling at the disgusted noises the kids made behind him. “Sesame chicken, right?”

  Izzy had no idea why she was surprised he remembered her favorite take-out dish. She nodded dumbly, words failing her at that moment and the beating of her heart reminding her once again that he was trying.

  Tanner scooted Ava and Noah into the truck and paused beside the door, suddenly looking uncomfortable. “I, um, I’m not going into the office tomorrow. I have a few errands to run and stuff so, uh, if you need anything, just make a list tonight.”

  She had to have heard him wrong. “You’re…you’re taking Friday off? You’re taking a non-holiday required three-day weekend?”

  He grinned and nodded. “Perks of being the boss, remember?”

  Izzy wanted to tell him that being the boss hadn’t offered any perks in the past few years. She wanted to say she couldn’t remember the last time he’d been willing to miss this much work. She wanted to tell him that she was terrified that in thirty-two days everything would go back to the way it had been. And she was only just realizing that the way it had been hadn’t been as great as she thought.

  Instead she smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I remember.”

  ***

  “I’m sorry, Iz. You’re a great employee, but I can’t show you any favoritism.”

  Izzy chewed the inside of her lip and nodded, quietly thanking her manager before fleeing his office. She should have known she couldn’t get any extra hours at the coffee shop.

  Of course she could never top Tanner’s birthday gift for her, but she wanted to make it special, and for that she needed some extra cash. Not to mention the fact his birthday was just a few weeks before Christmas and she was screwed.

  She leaned her forehead against the steering wheel of her car. If only her dad hadn’t cut her off from everything, this wouldn’t be an issue. She sighed before reluctantly starting her car to head home. That really wasn’t an option anymore. Being with Tanner was far and away more important. She’d just have to make this work.

  Her teeth worried her bottom lip the entire drive and as she trudged up the two flights of stairs into the apartment. At least Tanner had football practice and she’d be able to figure out a plan before he…

  “Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted brightly when she walked through the door. His gaze swept over her, and his brows pulled together. “What’s wrong, Belle?”

  So practice was done early tonight. Great. “Just a busy day, baby.” She smiled and lifted up on her tiptoes to plant a kiss on his cheek. “I’m going to go take a long, hot shower and climb in bed with a sexy football player who is home much earlier than expected.”

  Tanner offered a small grin, but the lines on his forehead stayed in place. She skirted around him into the relative sanctuary of the bathroom. Izzy stripped her clothes off as soon as she shut the door, a sigh filled with a mixture of relief and frustration escaping her lips. She closed her eyes beneath the hot spray, willing the water to give her the answer she was looking for.

  She stood there for a long time, lost in thought. Getting a second job would be her only solution, but how would she explain that to Tanner? And how could she possibly manage her course load and two jobs?

  Izzy felt the movement behind her before she even heard the curtain being pulled aside. She couldn’t stifle the gasp of surprise as she spun around to see Tanner. “Baby, what are you doing?”

  Without a word, he gathered her close to him and lowered his head to claim her lips. Every worry disappeared from her mind at the very first touch from Tanner. His fingers trailed down her spine and she shivered, stepping as close to him as possible.

  “Tell me what’s wrong,” he said breathlessly when they finally both pulled away for air. “Just tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart. I’ll fix it.”

  She swallowed and shook her head. “You can’t fix everything, baby.”

  His arms locked around her waist and he lifted her so she was level with his stormy gaze. A small squeak escaped, and she wrapped her legs around him. Tanner turned to the right and pressed her against the wall. “The hell I can’t. Tell me.”

  Before she even had a chance to answer, his hands cupped beneath her and his mouth began trailing hot kisses along her neck and shoulder. “Tell me, sweetheart,” he murmured against her skin.

  Izzy arched her back, pushing into him. Feeling the physical proof of his need for her was a heady sensation. “I-I can’t.” She barely gasped out the words.

  Tanner lowered his head, making a path down from her collarbone with his tongue. “Yes you can, Belle. You can tell me anything.”

  She shook her head against the tile. Did he honestly expect her to think at this particular moment, much less carry on a cognitive conversation? She struggled to catch her breath long enough to answer as his fingers began teasing her. “I, oh geez, Tanner.” She whimpered and bit down on his shoulder in frustration. “I can figure this out on my own, baby.”

  Every muscle in his body stilled. After several long beats, he shifted her slightly and raised a hand to hook a finger under her chin. “I know you can, sweetheart.” His passion-laced voice softened as he spoke. He brushed his lips across hers. “You are strong and smart.” He quirked his lips into a smirk and pressed hard against her again, close enough she groaned from the torture. “And sexy as hell. But you don’t have to do a damn thing alone anymore. I’m yours forever, remember?”

  In spite of the passionate haze surrounding them, as soon as he said the words, Izzy couldn’t stop her own from tumbling out. “I wanted to do something really special for your birthday, but I can’t get any more hours at work and I don’t know how I could fit in a second job. And you gave me the most amazing—”

  His finger landed on her lips and a smile spread across his. “Now was that so difficult?” Tanner’s hand dropped and maneuvered its way between their bodies, stroking a gentle line that caused Izzy to bite her lower lip. “Hell, that’s easy, sweetheart.”

  He returned his attention to her chest, softly kissing his way back up to her mouth, sliding inside her just as he reached her lips, both of them groaning simultaneously. Tanner broke the kiss and pressed his forehead against hers as he moved slowly in and out, taunting and tormenting them both. If he kept this up, she might die of need.

  “You’re going to listen to me when I tell that you don’t need to pay for a damn thing in this apartment. Not the bills. Not the food.” He moved slightly faster. “Not one damn thing. You’re gonna work as much or as little as you want and you’re gonna let me take care of you.”

  Izzy
could do little more than nod in agreement. He finally kicked his pace up, and with one final thrust, their cries intermingled just as the water began to cool.

  Tanner gathered her close to his chest and, with a strength she found impressive, carried her to the bedroom. They both stretched out on the bed on their sides, ignoring the water they dripped on the comforter.

  Looking in his eyes, she finally spoke the words haunting her heart. “I don’t want you to think I’m using you. Y-you’re the perfect boyfriend and I…” She shrugged helplessly.

  The hand that had been stroking her cheek stilled and the smile cleared from his face. “Sweetheart, you are normally right, but you got this all wrong.” He sat up long enough to tuck a blanket around them. He laid on his back and pulled her against his side. “You keep saying I’m the perfect boyfriend, but everything I do is because of you. There’s no way in hell I’d wallpaper a ceiling or cook anything for anyone else. It’s just what you do to me.”

  She smiled and pressed her lips against his chest. She wanted to argue with him. No one had ever taken care of her as well as he did, not even her parents. “I-I’d kinda like to let you take care of me.” She cleared her throat and firmed her tone. “Even though I can take care of myself.”

  Tanner’s chuckled slightly, his breathing slowing. “I know and that makes you even hotter,” he mumbled just before he started snoring.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Tanner

  Despite his mounting frustration, Tanner turned on a placating smile. “I understand you usually have people select one of your packages, but I want my wife to be able to choose whatever she wants.”

  The young girl with sleek blonde hair and an overly made-up face batted her lashes at him and it was all he could do not to roll his eyes. “Well, isn’t she a lucky woman.”

  “Hell, no.” The words popped out before he could catch them. He was rapidly losing patience and had no desire to negotiate. This certainly wasn’t the only spa in Asheville. “Listen, my wife is going to have a guest with her. I’m going to give that person my credit card and you’re going to take it without complaining.”

  Instead of his words inspiring a level of respect or professionalism, the clerk behind the counter only kicked up the flirting a notch. Shit. He should have sent Dean to do this. He was more than happy to spend Tanner’s money.

  “Sure thing, Mr. Carlisle.” She practically cooed his name and leaned over the counter. “We will happily take care of anything she needs.”

  He shot her a glare. “Thanks.” The single word came out dryly and he made a quick exit.

  What the hell was all that? An overly affectionate blonde had gotten him into this situation to begin with; he certainly had no desire to deal with another one.

  Tanner muttered curses under his breath the entire way to his truck. His lips curled into a sardonic smile at the dent in the rear fender. Maybe he should leave it there as a reminder to not be such a total and complete asshole to his wife again.

  If he still had a wife at the end of this. His stomach clenched as the familiar reminder rolled through his mind. No. This was going to work. This had to work.

  He hit the button for the window to roll down as the air conditioner worked to cool the cab of his stifling hot truck from an hour in the sun. He grabbed the notebook off the passenger’s seat and checked off the spa. When the hell had he turned into the guy who needed a friggin’ to-do list?

  Oh right—when he decided to break every promise he ever made to his wife.

  Tanner leaned back on the headrest as the cold air began pouring out of the vents. He’d always regret each decision that led up to the moment his brother dragged him out of that bar, but a small part of him couldn’t help but feel a small measure of gratitude. He hadn’t realized how detached he had become from everything, especially Belle, until he started this plan to win her back.

  And he had to admit, despite the overwhelming fear that he couldn’t fix this, he was actually having fun. Trying to invent creative dates that would make that sparkle light up her eyes and that soft smile curve her lips and…

  How the hell could he have ignored her for so long?

  With a sigh, he glanced at the list again before tossing it on the seat beside him and pulling out of the parking lot. A grin tugged at the corner of his mouth. The florist was next. All right, maybe having flowers delivered at the spa was a bit of overkill, but she’d love it. Her cheeks would turn pink and she’d close her eyes and bury her nose in them, breathing in deeply.

  Damn. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Just thinking about Belle was driving him crazy. No matter how busy he’d been, when he crawled into bed at night she would curl into him and show him exactly how much she’d missed him. He’d never gone longer than a couple of days without touching her and tasting her.

  And now it had been two weeks. Dammit.

  He pulled himself under control long enough to order an obscene arrangement of roses and daisies. As an afterthought, he ordered a small yellow pitcher filled with sunflowers to be delivered with Belle’s flowers tomorrow. His mom always was a sucker for gifts from her boys.

  And he damn sure needed every bit of help he could get. His entire family would happily kick his ass to the curb if Belle couldn’t forgive him. But if he was going to have a chance in hell of making this work, he’d need a little more help.

  Tanner repeated the speech he’d spent half the night planning as he turned up the long driveway leading to his parents’ house. If the past two weeks had taught him anything, it was how to beg, and he had no problem begging his mom to do one tiny favor.

  He snorted. Only his mother would require begging to go for an all-expense paid spa trip.

  He’d briefly considered calling Belle’s best friend to join her, but she hadn’t talked about Caroline much lately. Maybe they’d had a falling out and he’d been too distracted to notice. Yeah, asshole fit.

  All the preparation in the world, however, couldn’t have prepared him for his mother’s reaction when she agreed before he even told her the entire plan. “I’d love to, son,” she calmly stated, interrupting his grand speech.

  He stood with his mouth gaping open for several long minutes. “Y-you would?”

  Tracy Carlisle wiped her flour-covered hands on her apron and tilted her head to pin her son with an irritated glare. “As much as I don’t think you deserve to have Izzy forgive you, I don’t want to see you two…” Her voice trailed off, and he was dumbfounded to see tears collecting in the corners of her eyes. “She’s just as much my daughter as if I’d had her myself, and I want her to be happy. For some reason I really don’t understand anymore, you make her happy. Even when you’re barely home or off screwing around.”

  Tanner sighed and hung his head. “Hell, Mom, why didn’t you ever tell me?”

  She shrugged and picked up her rolling pin once more, attacking the dough in front of her. “Because you’re a grown man who shouldn’t have to have people telling him how to behave?”

  Well, hell. The reminder this wasn’t just about what happened at some bar in Nashville hit him between the eyes once again. This was about years of Tanner screwing up his marriage. He wanted to punch something. Or kick something. But the itching from his left hand reminded him what happened when he lost control of his temper.

  “So you’ll go with her tomorrow?” He repeated the question, stuffing down all the thoughts surfacing of just how long he’d been disregarding his family. If Belle could forgive him, he’d never fall into that trap again.

  A smile kicked up the corners of his mother’s mouth as she laid the flattened dough across the pie pan. “What woman in her right mind wouldn’t love an afternoon at the spa and having her son foot the bill?” She raised one eyebrow at him. “Just don’t expect to have me to spend the whole time extolling your virtues to her.”

  Tanner couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’d never dream of it.”

  ***

  Where was she?

  Where
the hell was she?

  Tanner paused in front of the couch to grab his cell. Ten thirty-seven. He tossed the phone back on the couch and resumed the path he was wearing in the carpet. He’d never felt closer to insanity in his life.

  She could have had an accident. She could be hurt. She could be lost. She could be…

  An icy feeling spread from his head to his toes. She could be with someone else. She’d never once given him a reason to doubt her, but wasn’t he always the one saying she was the hottest thing on two legs?

  Just as he reached down to pick up the phone for the tenth time in the past twenty minutes, he heard the knob turn and the squeak as the door swung open. Belle practically burst through the door, her cheeks rosy and her eyes sparkling. Damn if she wasn’t the most gorgeous thing he’d ever seen.

  He crossed the room in a few large strides and pulled her close. The relief at finally seeing her, at finally knowing she was okay, superseded his anger. For a moment. After he’d assured himself she was physically okay, he held her at arm’s length. “Where the hell have you been?”

  She grinned. She friggin’ grinned. His temper shot through the roof.

  “Baby, I told you I had my study group tonight.” She stepped out of his arms, dumped her book bag and coat on the couch, and walked into the kitchen.

  He clenched and unclenched his teeth. “That was supposed to be done nearly two hours ago. Where were you? And why didn’t you answer your phone?”

  Belle rooted in the refrigerator for a minute before popping her head up and fixing him with another smile. Why the hell was she smiling? Couldn’t she tell he was worried? Pissed?

  “I’m sorry, baby, our group went over and my phone was dead so I couldn’t call you. Did you eat? Do you want me to heat you up some leftovers? I’m starving.” She continued to pull out containers from the refrigerator before spinning around to pull two plates down from the cabinet.